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subtledream newsletter + wilderness within podcast

subtledream newsletter 2024, 26th edition

Published 3 months ago • 10 min read

“It's not possible to save the world by trying to save it. You need to find what is genuinely yours to offer the world before you can make it a better place. Discovering your unique gift to bring to your community is your greatest opportunity and challenge. The offering of that gift — your true self — is the most you can do to love and serve the world. And it is all the world needs.”

by Thomas Berry, Soulcraft: Crossing into the Mysteries of Nature and Psyche


open share / musings

Yesterday, I turned 38. Tomorrow, I will have been in Aotearoa New Zealand for 4 months. A wild ride it has been. Alive and well.

I've been introducing myself with a new name, Kai (thanks to Molly).
I launched
a podcast (more about this below!).
I started a men's group with some of my closest friends spanning the globe.
I bought another used Prius that is also blue. 🙃

Since the previous newsletter, I have danced alongside strangers and gone skinnydipping more than the previous 30-some years of my life (maybe not as much as my infant days). I have confronted internal struggles, darkness, shortcomings, sense of identity (or lack thereof), and (dis)connection with my emotions and traumas in deeply uncomfortable as well as beautiful ways. I have a new network of connections, as well as Camila, and myself too, to thank. I am grateful for my body to still learn new tricks, sustain a load on my back, balance on steep slopes, chop, paddle, bike, and walk for extended periods of time. Just now, I met and connected with a new person who, over the past decade or more, has had dozens of surgeries, injections, and therapies to heal her body from a number of diseases and conditions. The joy in her voice was palpable as she described some of the activities she partook in and the FUN and JOY she felt in the first full day of the Conscious Dance Aotearoa. She told me it was the first time she has gone to a dance festival, and had not danced like so since they were younger, pre-disease. What a potent reminder of health and wellness. Take care of your bodies and minds, folks.

My sister phoned me earlier today and it was the first time since I left California that we've conversed. I told her about the wild spectrum of feels and experiences of late, with little avoiding of what and how things are. It was liberating to speak with a family member without needing pretend things are different. When we're asked "how are you?", I cannot think of a super concise way to answer fully authentically. Maybe the words "grateful" or "healthy" and/or "grieving" come close as truly all-encompassing answers. "Good" alone seems hollow and woefully insufficient for the fullness this human existence - what are your thoughts?

Here's a message I received last month that brightened my day:

"It's a blessing to read the positive news of the world as so much grief and heaviness sits upon us right now (and truly all the time). It's so good to remember, highlight and share about the people who are doing wonderful things in the world and enacting such positive change and love. It's so important to keep that hope alive. Thank you." - Lily

In the past week or so I've rediscovered and been reminded once again of the value to me and others of my work & creations, even if I am paid (well) below minimum wage for the time. Financial compensation and worth does not equate value. I am thankful to Lily, Bethany (below), and so many others who have taken time to write me beautiful responses, birthday wishes, and more. Your words have brought me solace from the nostalgia I've been feeling of the people and places I am beginning to miss. And while it's been an intention to reach a stage where I am not reliant on others' approval and praise to reaffirm who I am and what I do, these kinds of cheering and feedback absolutely do provide the "You got this!" factor that is deeply valued. So, thank you, for opening this newsletter. My attempt to provide you a little snippet of my life and mind, perhaps a little bit of optimism, a dash of value, and some pretty pixels, in a digital package that isn't distributed by algorithms & apps but from a human to another human.

"Can’t wait to listen to your podcast and will def spread the news-I love your newsletters-they are always full of hope and inspiration 🙏 Sean and I think about you all the time!" - Bethany

In past editions, I usually included a bonus album for my patrons to enjoy. This time, I simply do not have the capacity to compile an album. It may or may not return in the future. My focus has really been on the podcast and the new life chapter. I do have the unedited version of the podcast with Beth Huggins for supporters. Below are 10 images in an attempt to encapsulate the last ~120 days on this island in the south Pacific. The top banner photo is an endemic bird, the Tui.


global good news

I really only take credit for reading, then copying & pasting the best of the best from Future Crunch's newsletters to your eyes and minds. Hope is more than a feeling, Hope Is A Verb (their words, not mine). The world is brighter than it seems. 🌏

◦ Over the last 7 years, Kenya has trained over 1,200 nurses, with a big emphasis on midwifery and maternal and neonatal care. It's working. The most recent data show that under-five mortality in Kenya has more than halved, there's been a significant uptick in vaccinations, 98% of women now receive antenatal care, and 89% of births are attended by a skilled provider.

◦ Thanks to young people, Poland's democratic opposition has won a majority of seats in both chambers of the country’s parliament, bringing to an end the eight-year rule of the current illiberal, misogynist and populist government. 'Whoever I talk to, it’s relief and hope.' Politico

◦ For the first time since dams were removed along the Elwha River in 2014, a local tribe has caught salmon. Coho have made the strongest recovery so far, with an estimated 6,821 returning to the river in 2022, the largest run in four years. Seattle Times

It will be a great time to introduce our children to the river, and hopefully revive some of those basic ceremonies around it.
-
Wendy Sampson, Lower Elwha Klallam tribal member

◦ A reforestation initiative in Tibet, is well under way to restore approximately 206,700 hectares of land in the mountains of Lhasa. Last year, 55,870 hectares of land were reforested, employing over 1.68 million people. Global Times

◦ Millions of girls in Eastern and Southern Africa will gain greater access to education thanks to a newly-approved $832 million programme called EAGER. The first phase will directly support over two million girls in Mozambique and Madagascar to stay in or return to school, and future phases are expected in Burundi, Comoros, the DRC, Lesotho, Malawi, Zambia, and Zimbabwe.

◦ Deforestation in Brazil continues to fall, despite severe drought. During September 629 km2 of forest was cleared, a 57% drop from the same month last year. Federal agencies have also removed illegal land grabbers from the Apyterewa and Trincheira Bacajá territories, with the goal of returning land rights to the 25,000 Indigenous people who live there.

◦ Worldwide, there are 50 million more girls in school today than there were in 2015. Completion rates for girls have increased from 86% to 89% in primary school, and from 54% to 61% in high school. There are five million more girls completing each level of education every year now compared to seven years ago. Bad news happens suddenly. Good news happens slowly. UNESCO

◦ Bangladesh has become the first country globally to officially eliminate visceral leishmaniasis, a life-threatening neglected tropical disease. The country achieved the WHO's elimination target of less than one case per 10,000 people in 2017 and has sustained it to date, despite disruptions caused by the COVID-19 pandemic. TDR

◦ A court in Ecuador has ruled in favour of the Siekopai Nation’s claim to their ancestral homeland, Pë’këya, on the border of Ecuador and Peru, restoring property title for 42,360 hectares of some of the most biodiverse ecosystems on the planet, and mandating public apologies for centuries of violence, racism, and conquest. El País

Our elders and our youth are so happy to finally return to our home, our spiritual heartland where our myths and the spirits from other dimensions await us. Although colonizers have tried to uproot us from this territory, they have failed. Now we have officially been able to recognize our land for the Siekopai, the Multi-Colored People.
-
Justino Pianguaje, Siekopai Leader

Yes, everything in the U.S. can seem awful, apart from the fact that 21 million kids will get free lunches this summer; 22 states just increased their minimum wage, which will benefit 9.9 million workers; inflation is well and truly over (seriously); more than 40% of the population now lives in states that are dedicated to 100% clean energy; Obamacare enrolments are surging in southern states; blue collar jobs are booming and all other major sectors of the economy except for leisure and hospitality have seen job numbers fully recover from COVID; the IRS has collected half a billion dollars in back taxes from delinquent millionaires since 2022; soda taxes in five cities are working better than expected; millions of people just got access to cheaper insulin; the proportion of Texans living in poverty is declining; California has a new law allowing parents who experience miscarriage and stillbirth to take leave from work; trans people are finding refuge in upstate New York; a new FDA rule allowing gay and bisexual men to give blood is making donations more inclusive; Minneapolis has figured out the right way to help people experiencing homelessness; Illinois recently implemented a raft of progressive laws, including a ban on dozens of rifles and handguns; and the federal government just issued a pardon to every American who has ever used marijuana.

And the 66 good news stories you didn't hear about in 2023, courtesy to Future Crunch (I love them).


original work / offerings

Well, after 3 years of dreaming, marinating, traveling, collaborating, recording, and producing, it's finally here.

I am very proud to present you the Wilderness Within (WW) Podcast, which now has 4 episodes live on essentially all major listening platforms - Apple Podcasts, Spotify, RSS, Pandora, TuneIn, iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Deezer, and more!

WW is an exploration of our inner worlds through stories and experiences. It is inspired by the stories of good friends and my interest to dive beyond the superficial and into the depths of one’s devotions and motivations in life. Each episode is intended to be an open share and celebration of their triumphs, failures, learnings, and vulnerabilities of the guest(s) and the host - yours truly. Follow & engage wildernesswithinpod.com or @wildernesswithinpod

Wilderness Within is possible due to the ongoing financial support of patreon supporters. We are big fans of the value-driven, pay-it-forward model, and the reason why you won't hear razor subscriptions or NordVPN discounts being offered is thanks to the few dollars that my supporters pitch in each month or year. In the past few months, several supporters have dropped off, lowering the monthly support that is now just enough to pay my editor to produce/master 1 episode per month. I'd very much like to increase the patronage to ~$400 USD/month, which would allow up to 2 episodes to be produced. Will you be that supporter? 🙏🏽

Besides becoming a patron, some of the best ways to support this podcast is to share the episodes or show with friends and family, and to rate WW on your fav listening platform. Whatever you are able to do, thank you!

Available episodes:

Kai (Jonathan) Mariana
Orion Beth

Special thanks: Scott H. & Carlos M. for soundtrack & logo; Melissa C. for editing + production magic
Gratitude to: Paul J., Antoine M., Aiyana B., Deborah C., Rene D., Luke F., Kelly P., Carina F., Kelsea L., Khen R., Kelsey Y., Michael C., Evan S., Reiki C., Kristine S., Lindsay C., Anne G., Yu Shan C., Otis S. Steven T., Delvin S., Steven M., Steph P., Anna W., Camila N., Dana W., Naira d. G., Dora L., Orion H., Michelle K., Steven W., Gautier B., Jackie C. S., Romar S., Peter W., Jacky C., Tsetop S., Frankie L., Jim B. Lisa C., Marek B., Ryan L., Mikey L., Alex A., and more past &
present patrons - in making this dream of creating content wherever I go a reality.


recommendations

Keeping it real simple for this edition.

Book: Bill Plotkin - Soulcraft: Crossing into the Mysteries of Nature and Psyche - inner transformation via immersion in nature

Podcast: Life is a Festival - lan Mackenzie: The Masculine Longing for Mythic Imagination - history of the mythopoetic vs men's rights movements, mainstream anti-culture, the masculine longing to be seen, etc.

Music: Rumbo Tumba - new fav artist on Spotify!

Video: Happen Films - Incredible 1.5-Acre Syntropic Food Forest with Over 250 Plant Species

video preview

gratitude

For those of you who are new to the newsletter, welcome & thank you!
Your time & attention are invaluable, and I sincerely hope you find value here.

This publication is a labor of love & devotion. For each edition, I spend hours compiling, writing, editing, and weaving content altogether. It is made possible in huge part due to patrons who pitch in regularly on patreon. Bonus content and print discounts are also perks. This income has become a humble, reliable, and essential pillar of financial support. It allows this publication and the podcast to be somewhat financially feasible while keeping them ad-free (a rarity in this age, let's be honest!). I must thank friends around the globe who hire me for their portraits, weddings, photo & video lessons, business/org shoots, etc. If you're keen to learn more and/or are feeling financial abundant, I'd absolutely appreciated a dollar here and there, cheers!

If regular contributions aren't your thing, I have a tip jar - I'm a "street busker" w/ cameras, mics, and musings​.

Sharing this newsletter, the podcast, or buying a print are welcomed ways to support me. 😊

Grateful for you Reader,

Kai (Jonathan)

subtledream newsletter + wilderness within podcast

Community-supported, purpose-driven, gear-lugging vagabond creating content for good. Currently putting time and energy into my newsletter, podcast, and starting a new life chapter down under. 📍 Te Waipounamu South Island, Aotearoa New Zealand

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